Saturday, September 30

Star Wars Hairstyle Kujichagulia (pt 5)

"Hello, what have we here?

"A hairstyle that's addicted to muscle? I don't get it!"

Jim Jones ft Max B - Beverly Hills Cop
(Why, Max, WHY?!?)

"Yeah, me neither," said Han Solo Hairstyle, shrugging his shoulders(or rather shrugged the phantom shoulders still represented somewhere in his hair(he's an autonomous hairstyle, remember? so no shoulders),

"People can choose to do what they want to do, and you can choose to help us Luke Skywalker Hairstyle, not just sit there and wish you had some muscles. Imagine what it might mean to Jerry Seinfeld hairstyle if we don't help?!? I just don't get it!

"I mean, having no muscles doesn't mean you're defenseless! Lando Calrissian Hairstyle terminates each of his hair-strands with a cnidocyte! Try getting stuck with some o' that toxin and then try to tell me that a hairstyle with no muscles isn't tough! We're all tough with no muscles! Right, Leia Hairstyle?!"
The Slits- Kill them with love

Don't talk to Princess Leia Hairstyle right now she is soooo frustrated with Luke Skywalker Hairstyle. Can't we just assassinate him? No, don't even think like that, he's a hairstyle, one of us.

Les Rallizes Desnudes - Night of the assassins

"Luke Hairstyle, none of us understand what you're going through... Maybe if you could explain we could maybe help you."

Tuesday, September 19

Star Wars Hairstyle Kujichagulia (pt 4)

"Luke Hairstyle! Luke hairstyle! O why can't you just be a man and stop crying?!?! You're an autonomous hairstyle goddamit. I'm acting manly and I'm a goddammm girl's hairstyle: your twin sister hairstyle! Remember?"

Ludacris - He man
(Luda c/o NahRight;
Skeletor c/o He-man blog (c/oMBS))

"C'MON LUKE HAIRSTYLE! Our mission is clear! We have to do it!"


"Luke hairstyle,","what the fuck are you some kind of hippy? Maybe you need to do some yoga, listen to some sitars, realign your shakiras or whatever, then maybe can we get on this mission?"

Lamonte Young ft Pandit Pran Nath - Raga for Ravi (RapidCher link)
(extremely hippie vibes c/o ClassicalConnect)

"NOOOOOO!!!! "

Mac Mall - Shakin' in the alley

"Are you some kind of hippie junky, Luke Hairstyle?","you're shaking like you're so afraid, like you're strung out on fear with the DTs. But wait, if you're addicted to fear, and you have the shakes, a well-characterized withdrawal symptom, that means that you are without fear. Which means.... LUKE HAIRSTYLE,", "ARE YOU NOT AFRAID!?!"

"No, I'm not afraid."

"Then what are you really addicted to? What is making your hairstyle shake to & fro?"

"IDON'THAVEANYMUSCLES!!!!!!" he screamed, because he was just a hairstyle, addicted to muscle.

Monday, September 11

Star Wars Hairstyle Kujichagulia (pt 3)

Wiley - Crash Bandicoot freestyle
Theatre of Eternal Music - B Flat Dorian Blues 19 X 63 (5th Day Of The Hammer)
Aural Fit - Sensory Deprivation
Han Solo Hairstyle isn't much of a decider. How could he be? In the Star Wars films, Han Solo vacillated between selfishness and altruism. These flip-flop tendencies have only multiplied and magnified since he became a headless hairstyle. AND, Han Solo Hairstyle is parted in the middle!!

The left side and right side of Han Solo Hairstyle can't agree what to do!

Han Solo Hairstyle's right side'll say: "I wanna be a pirate ship!"

& then the left'll say, "I wanna be a MOUSTACHE!" A little inconducive to productivity, no?

Wiley ft Rage & Esco & Jammer & Scorcher & Gods Gift - 16 Bar Rally

Luckily, Princess Leia Hairstyle has the leadership & charisma to rally Han Solo Hairstyle to get things done. Also because maybe he still wants to carnal knowledge her.

Tuesday, September 5

Star Wars Hairstyle Kujichagulia (pt 2)

All the just-emancipated Star Wars Hairstyles immediately affirmed that Princess Leia Hairstyle is the leader, which you should already know why but I remind you anyway below (scroll a little).
Janet Jackson - Control (screwed)

It was natural that, following head-and-body-detachment, the Star Wars Hairstyles would socialize according to a strict Hairstyle Heirarchy, and that the Hierarchy would be topped by Princess Leia Hairstyle. After all, hers was the most interesting and orderly hairstyle of the entire system.
Actually though, calling it a heirarchy implies that there might've been important gradations of power & influence among the non-Leia Star Wars Hairstyles when really, the only ones that would've cared would be the slovenly little-bitch hairstyles like Luke Skywalker Hairstyle (about whom more in a post or 2). So really, let's call it what it is, actually: Princess Leia Hairstyle Gynarchy.



Traxamillion ft the Pack - Club Stuntin'
Cluster - Rote Riki
Flower Travellin' Band - Look at my window
Kuni Kawachi & Flower Travellin' Band - To your world
(these FTB tracks (former & latter) brought to you c/o COFWR&R)

Don't you remember? You want to challenge her secret mnemonic hairstyle memory stunts? Good luck, pal. Go ahead and ommatidiate your browser with optimally-packed tabbed browser windows; catalog & map each window in a memory-enhancing method of loci for your mind. Even if you develop the greatest computer-assisted memory strategy, neither you nor any unscalped Star Wars Hairstyles can compete with her hairstyle hysteresis memory capacity. Why is Princess Leia Hairstyle the leader? Simply put, she remembers.